2012-06-27

Day 32:Forgetfullness

While i used to have and train a good memory i also tended to forget somethings or select what i remember and whatnot.

(for get full mess=forgetfullness)

we humans are all experiance the same, as we get older and older we start to forget more and more, science says that we from the age of 14 start to loose our brain cells and no more grows so our brain "shrinks" and so this is a reason to it.

but actually what are memories? recorded pictures and sounds perfectly stored with all their details in "somwhere" and one can recall these images, sounds, details upon thinking about them...hmmm thinking. then it must have something to do with thoughts.

i the desteniiprocess one is shown and explained what are memories and how do they work, and why do we keep "loosing" them. and then comes the realization of course that i am my past-present-and future, therefore i am what i did,do,will do so i can - being here in breath - precisely "recall" or a better suited word:exist as, the past moments of myself. and while re-living myself i can see what ACTUALLY happened to the smallest detail. this is important because the mind is always take sides and judges the memories and places and views them from a certain perspective (remember:i am the mind equal and one) while when i am reliving myself here i can see what is actually happened and what were the starting point or cause and such things.

still while walking my process i sometimes forget an appointment (like today) or an event or that i have to do something. but while investigating the moments when i should have realized that i have to do something i forgot to realize myself because i was in my mind. i went into thoughts or when decided to do something i didn't care about what i will have to do in that time-frame.

self forgiveness:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider everything and all wihtin and as oneness and equality when starting an activity.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider my pre-agreed plan of activities before i start an activity.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into my mind while doing something therefore allow myself to forget/not realize that i have an appointment in the very near future.
i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to seperate myself from being here wihtin and as breath while doing something.
i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to seperate myself from my pre-agreed appointment, and it's time.
i forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to not be aware of myself "in time" and not be aware of my dayly pre-agreed activities and their time.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to beleieve that i am limiting myself when i am following/living by my pre-agreed appointments and times throught my day.
i forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not consider the other i have a meeting with while forgetting and using this forgetfulness as an excuse for not taking self responsibility for myself in time.

Self correction:

when and as i see myself going into the pattern of hiding in excuses of forgetting something, i stop, breathe, forgive myself and walk my self correction here.
when and as i see myself going into the pattern of not considering others based on that i am in my mind, i stop, breathe, bring myself back here, forgive myself, and investigate the solutions to the actual problems i have caused.
when and as i see myself going into the pattern of separating myself from others or things based on my thoughts i stop, breathe, bring myself back here, and realize that i am one and equal within and as all.

i commit myself to continue to create pre-agreed activities throught my day and keep myself to these commitments.
i commit myself to walking and investigating my past as my present and realize myself and work on the point i encounter here.


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