2012-11-01

Day 130: Sharing HERE - breathing

I've been all over myself, doing things that sucks me in, grabs me off my lists and plans, takes away from "the world" around me, yet here i am, and i have something to share that all must see, realise and understand.


Breathing. (destonian wiki) Without it this would not be possible. I could not write this blog, I could not realise myself, i could not be here in the physical, here would be no technology no humans, no animals, no plants, no planets or anything at all. Everything Breathes, the smallest and the largest forms of beings do even if it's not fitting into our current narrow-minded definition of breathing (wiki) yet it is true and we don't even care to see understand or realise it in it's complexity and entirety.

While i've been away, i was still here, funny how is this possible, actually i have been like fighting myself, having some moments here, having some way over my head, then again, like i would be stepping in and out of my grave-and it's only gets me closer to it.

Interesting that how I define something that is past:"something I had but now I don't".
It has 3 main pillars that keeps it standing,
1 is the belief that I am seperate from that thing,
2 is the belief that I can own that something, and
3 is the belief that I can loose that something I owned.

All of these are easy to see that just self created illusions, so it is only what I made up to justify that past actually exists, and it's unchangeable, and i can only remember it or don't.
The question is:"does that exists that noone knows or remembers?" it's past that's clear but these definitions does not tell if something exists or not, and here's the catch of it, because i don't want me to care about what's exists and what's not, what's HERE or what's not, all i made myself care about is past present and future and ownership/posession.
It keeps me busy, it takes me away where everything can be true at once and yet nothing is true ever: the land of the illusions.

An interesting thing I do when i'm long in this realm or keep jumping in and out of it: i also create some clues TO reality. in every dreamworld, in every takeaway, in every posession, in every careless joyride, there is a hidden "treasure" that is from reality. I can't create a big or powerfoul illusion enough to keep REALITY outside forever. Sometimes just a small raindrop, other times it's a whole wave of a hurricane, yet reality is always in all of my deceptions and illusions of myself.

I have been wanting to solve this, seeking to understand why i keep running away from reality, from myself, from what i do. Before, i had plenty of justifications and reasons why i keep doing it and "falling back" into some of my habits and obsessions, i thought i found the answer, but i haven't.

Here i see why. I see the picture as a whole. and that's it, this is who i created myself to be through accepting and allowing myself to be and become this. it's not about the paint i used or where i got it from, nor about the brus or how i hold it and move it on the canvas, nor it about the frame i made to hold the painting, nor the place/enviroment i created this image and likeness of myself, nor about the process of creating it, nor about the starting point of creating it, nor about the end result or the product of it. It is about me showing me to myself.
ME sharing myself with me unconditionally, the true created me, with all there is to have done.

so i'm here at last, stopping to look as a detective or analyse the painting as an art buyer, and only look to see myself here.

Of course nothing comes out of looking and seeing myself when i don't do anything with it! so seeing understanding and realising myself is only a part of the process, and then everything i see and realise i must take responsibility for, because it's me, no denyals, no hiding, no running away but facing myself and standing up and stating that "i change myself within and as what and who i am" not from an outside perspective, but within and as myself.

How do i start something? I gather/make/learn the tools and use them for the best interest of all. making sure i do not abuse anyone including myself in the process, of course sometimes I have to demonlish a whole structure to build a new one, yet not with blowing the previous thing away-that would make a mess I can never clean before i pass, so I rather take one brick at a time and deconstruct myself here, while breathing, and committing myself to do it till the last brick.

This is what Desteni I Process Lite is for, starting a journey to see yourself and learn the tools that can be the best tools for all and create all and more that one can ever dreamed of. of course one can also use it for things that can abuse us all, just like with fire-you can share to give heat and light in the dark.
And due to Desteni being willing to show that everyone has it's life to work on this course is COMPLETELY FREE. and it comes with a support buddy who can guide you and assist in understanding what you might miss. and thus everyone can join and learn the way to create heaven on earth right HERE in equality and oneness.
All one has to do is give a name and an email and learn for life.

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